Many of us carry around with us a lot of “baggage” or “clutter” in our minds.
You know the sort of thing I mean, those mental to do lists that never get started ,thoughts about the friend who you’ve had a row with and haven’t made up yet, the career change you’ve been thinking about for the last few months. It’s really easy to build up that big old pile of could’ve and should’ve that just hold you back in the your life. You know you need to let go but you don’t.
The thing is though that all this “stuff” we carry around in our heads takes a lot of our energy and emotional attention to maintain. Just like a computer hard drive these unproductive thought programs just take up memory and slow your mental processing power down!
Are you like this?
If you are, I’m guessing it’s having a negative influence on your confidence and self esteem.
Take a look at your life and get rid of this baggage by asking yourself a series of questions and by completing the following exercise.
In effect, what we are doing is making certain tasks “complete”, drawing a line under them and moving on.
Another term for this is “psychological completion” or just “completion”
The following set of questions can be taken at one sitting or over a number of hours/days.
By writing the answers down they become more formal.
Get to it and watch your confidence soar!
1. Putting up with!
• Make a list of 10 things that you are putting up with at home
• Make a list of 10 things that you are putting up with at work
• Make a list of 10 things that you are putting up with in any other area of your life
• Make an action plan to get rid of/communicate these things that you have been putting up with
2. Unfinished matters!
• Make a list of things that are unresolved/unfinished in your life
• Make an action plan of how to reduce this number!
• Do you need to clear the air with anyone? If so, just do it! Life is too short!
• Did you ever say that you were going to call someone or keep in touch with someone yet have done nothing about it? If so, call them or send an email to them today
• Let go of as many coulds, woulds, shoulds, maybe, oughts as you can. Write these down.
3. Your standards!
• Write down the standards that you have been saying to yourself that you should have; let go of these and write down a list of the standards that you are going to have in your life from this day forward.
• List 5 people who you admire the most. Identify their greatest qualities, behaviour and how they lead their life. What standards so they have? What standards could you raise starting today to be more like them?
• Respect that other’s standards will be different from your own. Think of 5 close colleagues or friends – what are their standards and how are they different to yours?
By completing these exercises you will be able to focus more on the here the now and the future.
You will now be able to let go of some of the things that have been taking up your valuable attention units – those things that knock your self esteem.